Thursday, December 14, 2006

My First Crush

My first real deal crush hit me in Junior High. He and I were friends. I was everyone's friend in 8th grade. The boys came to me for girl advice. The girls shared their "Going Steady" woes with me. All the while, no one passed me a note declaring their affection for me. Sigh. I was the class therapist even at 13.

So Jacob S. and I were buddies. We'd sometimes give him a ride to school and often he'd come over to my house to study. I knew he liked Rozanne but it didn't stop me from crushing. One night, while we talked on the phone like we did every night, he told me that CJ (my BFF) had told him of my feelings. I stammered out a denial, clutching the phone, trying not to cry. I felt betrayed by my (former) BFF, CJ- how could she!? Everyone knows you don't tell your BFF's secret crush that she like likes him!

While all of these feelings and thoughts are whirling around my head Jacob tells me, "I just like you as a friend." The kiss of death on any crush. All my hopes and daydreams of walking around the schoolyard hand in hand after sharing lunch were squashed. I got off the phone and sobbed. I was inconsolable. I had no idea how I was going to face anyone at school the next day. No doubt the news has spread- our class was small and tightknit. I was mortified and heartbroken.

When I woke up the next day my Mom had slipped a note under my bedroom door. In that note she told me that sometimes we will love people who might not return our feelings but that does not make our feelings any less a treasure. When we love someone it is a gift we offer them. That my love is precious and never something I should be ashamed of or hide. I've kept that note all these 20 years. It meant that much to me. (Thanks Mom.)

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Reveal Your Blog Crush is TOMORROW! If anyone gets their heart broken, I'll send you a copy of my Mom's note. It'll make you feel better.

17 comments:

sue said...

Your mom is the BEST.

Mrs. Ca said...

What a great mom! That is wonderful advice. I don't actually remember my first crush - I had so many of them.

s@bd said...

your mom is brilliant.

(and I'm totally stealing that note for when my kids need it.)

alissa said...

That is the sweetest note ever. Moms rock.

ValhallaOne said...

That's the best thing anyone could have said. :)

Alison said...

Awww. I love your mom.

Bob Merrick said...

God I love your mom.

Melissa said...

I hope you beat Rozanne's ass, she totally broke the code.

And your mom is a wise one.

justrun said...

That is so sweet. What a good thing to remember when raising a daughter. Validated feelings, I mean.

snackiepoo said...

A++ Mommy-ness there!

If anyone gets there heart broken, I will bitchslap them ;). Erm, I mean....I hope no one gets their heart broken because this is all about frivolity and fun, right?

Brookelina said...

You totally made me tear up. Beautiful.

By the way, I was the therapist of my junior high class too. All the boys I had crushes on called me for advice on how to get with my friends. It was brutal.

Nihilistic said...

How could he like someone named Rozanne over you??? Pffff

Anonymous said...

Hi poopers,

I just wanted to say i love you and I am listening to a little ray l.
the supple

matilda said...

Can I still get a copy of your mom's note? I'm needing some cheering up and I haven't even been rejected yet. Plus my blog is private, you have to be invited to read it. I have 10 lucky readers. I don't think I'll be getting any blog crush notes sent to me. Amy

Kerry said...

Your mom needs a Mother of the Year award. Those are some good words she gave you! Thanks for sharing

CruiserMel said...

How wonderful of your mom to do that for you. And I like the delivery, too. Subtle (the under the door slide) which says "I care and here's some valuable info" but without causing even more tears. Dang, that woman does deserve Woman of the Year. Can I borrow her?

Sizzle said...

Hey Mom? Are you available for a loan out to some bloggers?

xoxo
sizz