Saturday, October 21, 2006

Be The Friend You Want to Have

"If you tell me you already understand, I feel a little pessimistic. If you say you do not understand, I feel more optimistic."
-Thich Nhat Hahn

This Vietnamese monk, so renowned for his insight, helps us remember that no one can live up to their image of themselves. We can only live out our questions.

I have learned from both sides- from being the one with all the answers and from being the one with all the questions- that there is no real bond with others until we share the evidence of who we are and not just our conclusions. It's taken a long time, but I finally get it. I cannot have both truth and love in my life until I speak from the "I" and stop putting all my pain into "you," until I own all my stumblings and stop projecting my misfortunes on to everyone nearby.

Having an honest friend- one before whom you can dump all your heart's pockets and still feel that you are worth something- is a form of wealth that will buy you nothing but will give you everything. And mysteriously and rightly, to find such a friend, we must be such a friend.

- taken from The Book of Awakening, Mark Nepo

7 comments:

Mr. Rodacre said...

You have given me so much by just being you - even if you don't think it true, it is.

Thank you for being my friend, Cupcake.

xoxo

JustRun said...

Very Ghandi "be the change you wish to see in the world" like. It's good for me to know there are people in the world that really do try to think that way- I think it's rare.
From the sounds of it, you are a great friend.

Claire said...

right on.

hannahhas said...

I love your words of wisdom (even if they are shared words).

You are the friend that everyone wants to have.

Anonymous said...

I like those kind of friends described in this post....I feel like I've found a handful but wish they were all that way, especially when I'm in a funk. Isn't the different level of friends interesting?

Anonymous said...

I have a feeling you are exactly the kind of friend you described.

Anonymous said...

You a very wealthy, my friend.