Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Cover Your Mouth, Please

It was bound to happen.

At first I thought it was just sympathy pains. The warm forehead. The feeling of fatigue. The inability to focus on the task at hand. As I sat in my supervisor's office going down my list of items to report, she coughed and looked glassy-eyed. It was then I could really feel it.

Her germs were seeping into me.

And even if they weren't actual germs, the mere idea of them created such a psychosis that I began to feel my throat closing up. I ran back to my desk and took two Tylenol. No. It couldn't happen. It won't happen. I have a guest coming! I cannot get sick. Period. End of story.

In my foggy state, I inadvertently sent emails to two people that had the same first name as the person I intended to email. They had no idea what I was talking about and I basically felt stupid. "Oh! Opps! Sorry!" Good thing I didn't say anything controversial. You know how I am always writing those controversial emails. Heh.

After downing an Airborne, I was in bed by 10. I managed to get 7 full hours of sleep when the sound of a boy calling his dog woke me from my deep slumber. (I wish I wasn't such a light sleeper.) He was calling out "Dirk! Dirk!" and then whistling. Then "Diiiiirk! Dirk!" whistle, whistle, "Dirrrrrrrrrrrk!" It's 5:30 in the morning kid. I'm sorry you lost your dog but, really, yelling? Not such a good idea. And hey, isn't Dirk a character from Boogie Nights? Great now I am thinking about porn. At 5:30 in the morning.

This is how my brain works.

Then my mind went to the image of my mom running down Regina Way (our childhood street) in her bathrobe with a broom in the early hours of the morning. Our cat, Dumbo, had caught a bird and was running with the still-alive-bird in his mouth. She took off after him trying to get him to release it and my sister and I followed, in our pajamas. Behind a bush, in the neighbor's yard, he finally let it go but it was too late. Maybe I am not even remembering that entirely correctly but the memory came... all from hearing a kid call out to his porn-star-named dog at 5:30 in the morning.

I think I need more Airborne.

12 comments:

Karl said...

Ha, nothing like that brain train...zooms around from place to place in nothing flat. Especially when you're in half-sleep.

Hope you don't get sick. Your supervisor should wear a surgical mask or something. Sheesh.

Mrs. Ca said...

Eek! I hope you don't get sick! I think I'm coming down with something (which usually happens to me after a big event passes) but I'm refusing to acknowledge it in the hope that it will just pass without me getting really sick.

Anonymous said...

is the Airborne perhaps causing hallucinations?

sue said...

Let's try this again... (blogger wouldn't let me post last time)

I hope my neighbors don't hear me yelling for my pups at 5 a.m., but then, we do live in the country so I'm sure they don't... right? And isn't it always the case that the cat gets out when I have my p.j.'s on? I think that is planned. Let's embarrass the human as much as possible. The cat is laughing on the inside... I know it!

Take care and hope you're not getting it. Mind over matter, Siz!!

Road Warrior said...

Holy Smokes! It's as big as all outdoors. I was just in Southern California this past weekend, and came back with a severely sore throat and achy flu-pains. Brought it back with me to Colorado and now several others are complaining of the same thing. It's August! How can this be?

So, with little doubt about a course of action, and after being at work in a very nauseated and extremely tired state, I went home directly after work, downed some NyQuil, got up at about 7:00, ate, took one more dose of the wicked Evil Green Death and woke up this morning a new man. Of course, after so many bizarre NyQuil dreams of Conan O'Brien playing shuffleboard, and slow-mo replays of cats playing with balled-up socks, it was apparent that I had reached my daily limit of the magical jade elixir which kills anything that may ail me.

Maman said...

Good luck with those germs but you might be fighting a lost cause.. They say that your chances of getting sick increase the more stress you have been under... and moving and changing jobs are high on the stress list.

Just think of it this way, it is one more virus you don't have to fight next time round..

Becky said...

I also feel like I attract colds like flies on shit. I read this adventure series by Clive Cussler and the main character is Dirk. They released a movie version of one of the books, Sahara, with Matthew McConaughey. Now, there's a good Dirk:)

Bill said...

Everyone I know seems to be getting sick. I'm barricading myself indoors ... but sheesh. It's August. Someone's screwing up the planet, without a doubt.

Melissa said...

Yay! I'm not alone in Sickville. I dunno if it's allergies or a summer cold or what but I'm coughing and sneezing and wheezing to beat the band.

Hope you don't catch it!

JustRun said...

Vitamin C, orange juice, lots of sleep! Get better before your long, fun weekend!

Nihilistic said...

Naughty Kitty!!

Unknown said...

*LMAO* sorry you're sick