Monday, November 13, 2006

Sweaters Taste Delicious

I've mentioned before that my cat, Dottie, is a bit- how shall I put this?- off-kilter. She's unique. She marches to the beat of her own drummer. Ok. Let's cut the shit. She's a spaz.


Of course, her spaziness has nothing to do with pets becoming like their owners.

Oh no.

I've gotten used to, if not still occasionally annoyed by, Dottie's need to scratch the sides of the litter box incessantly for a minimum of 20 strokes per side (that includes back and front) before exiting, running around the apartment for a victory lap then returning for 12 strokes on just the left and right sides. Her major spazouts are now relegated to her morning Indie 500 game played with her brother. She'll run up the side of the chair, cling there perilously, her head darting left and right while her tail flicks madly and her eyes, big saucers, scan the room for her big bully brother. When she spots him she leaps like Spiderman to another piece of furniture, on contact digging her claws in and making her mark. Besides the ruining of furniture, it's pretty cute. And the fellating her brother stopped after they were both fixed. Phew! That one was a bit. . . uncomfortable.

But what I don't find cute or amusing or endearing is Dottie's obsession with eating clothes. At first, I thought it was just my throw blankets that weren't safe. The ones with dangling bits on the edge where particularly at risk. Scarves with fringe? Forget it. Pack those away. But sweaters? Dresses? In the past month Dottie has eaten holes in two of my sweaters. Holes. Noticeable holes. WTF?!

Exhibit A: A seemingly normal sweater sleeve.
Exhibit B: Dottie's grunge masterpiece.
(Hmm, maybe she was trying to help me rekindle an old fashion trend? We ARE in Seattle afterall.)

Exhibit C: Undisguiseable hole in the middle of the back of the sweater.

Are my panties even safe?!

Maybe she just wants me to clean my room?


Margaret said...

No, your panties are most certainly not safe! Sorry, I have a clothing eating dog.

Mrs. Ca said...

I don't think I'd count on anything being safe! I guess I was lucky that my cat only ate salsa con queso, but damn, it used to get me really steamed that I just had to turn my head for a second and she'd be whisker deep in a bowl of the stuff.

Anonymous said...

I pulled out one of Angelou's blanket, last night, to put on her bed and there was a big part eaten out of the side. A little reminder from Dot. Awww


Egan said...

Dotie is full of life. The fellating her brother would make me uncomfortable too. I'm glad that's over with. What happens if you use mothballs in your drawers?

justrun said...

Wow, she's a fiesty one. Not much is safe around my dog either, if she's bored. Not things with fringe, anyway.

Nihilistic said...

Your poor poor panties are sitting in their drawer huddled in the corner shaking with fear of being eaten!!

alissa said...

My dog when she was a puppy used to eat the crotches out of my underwear. Not even joking. For serious.

Jenny said...

it's so hard to be mad at her when she's soooo cute ;)

Mr_Rodacre said...

Maybe your clothes taste good? They are "Seasoned With Sizzle" so to speak... ;-)

Here, I found a little 2-page deallie about pets eating weird things:

Bre said...

I have a dog who eats panties. It's awful. Ever since I moved out of my parents house I've been amazed at how little underwear shopping I'm required to do. We've tried everything and now basically underwear goes right into the washing machine or into a basket high on a shelf. Nothing is sacred... Not even my favorite red shimmery ones!

Claire said...

Awesome pic, Sizz. Good luck keeping your undies safe!