Monday, October 09, 2006

Anything Worth Doing

Oh how does Daily Om do it? Somehow they manage to send me the message I need to hear. Today's message is all about fear and how anything worth doing will be accompanied by fear. This is true for me- the move, getting a new job, liking someone new. You have to be willing to take the risk to reap the rewards. And hell, even if the reward isn't what you initially envisioned, I bet the mere effort of trying to step out of your comfort zone is worth it.

I'm trying to convince myself of this. I'm really great at telling other people about the positives of risk-taking but I seem to not heed my own advice. Shame on me.

I suppose some might think me bold. I do have my brazen moments and not all of them involve being inebriated. Ahem. But I think that too often I do not express what I truly feel. I cut myself off internally and sever my heart from the truth. It's uncomfortable and not authentic. And I want to be authentic. Why is it that the things we want the most can make us the most scared?

I took some baby steps towards progress this weekend. I am trying to not feel inadequate in social situations. I am trying not to be so harsh when it comes to judging myself. I am trying, quite desperately, to let the Stuart Smalley in my head yell out (yes, yell- this is no time for whispering) positive affirmations, no matter how cheesy they might sound. Like this one sent to me by Bird: "First, I learned to forgive myself. Then, I told myself, go ahead and do whatever you want, it's okay by me!"

*Four days until I visit Santa Cruz!

10 comments:

Mrs. Ca said...

I think that is a lesson that most people should learn. I know that I, for one, tend to do things that I know are safe and take very few risks. Could be why I put off important things regularly, like trying to get a better job or deciding to have a baby. My husband is the same way, which is a bad thing. We really need to step outside of our comfort zones because we're seriously stuck in a pair of ruts.

Lushy said...

Today's Om was perfec. I've already saved it for future reference.

Bob Merrick said...

One of my favorite songs came on my ipod this morning... it is all about you have to have nothing to appreciate something...

JASON MRAZ LYRICS

"Life Is Wonderful"

It takes a crane to build a crane
It takes two floors to make a story
It takes an egg to make a hen
It takes a hen to make an egg
There is no end to what I'm saying

It takes a thought to make a word
And it takes some words to make an action
It takes some work to make it work
It takes some good to make it hurt
It takes some bad for satisfaction

La la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Al la la la la

It takes a night to make it dawn
And it takes a day to make you yawn brother
And it takes some old to make you young
It takes some cold to know the sun
It takes the one to have the other

And it takes no time to fall in love
But it takes you years to know what love is
It takes some fears to make you trust
It takes those tears to make it rust
It takes the dust to have it polished

Ha la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is so full of
Ah la la la la la la life is so rough
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is our love
Ah la la la la la

It takes some silence to make sound
It takes a loss before you found it
And it takes a road to go nowhere
It takes a toll to make you care
It takes a hole to make a mountain

Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ha la la la la la life is wonderful
Ha la la la la la life is meaningful
Ha la la la la la life is wonderful
Ha la la la la la life it is...so... wonderful
It is so meaningful
It is so wonderful
It is meaningful
It is wonderful
It is meaningful
It goes full circle
Wonderful
Meaningful
Full circle
Wonderful

JustRun said...

I think you'll find that when it's honestly okay by you, it's remarkable okay with everyone else, too.

Nihilistic said...

I'll be happy just knowing your in California...if only for a bit.

sandra said...

Sizz, we're trading places a bit -- you arrive in CA, I leave...and then there was balance in the world.

Bre said...

That's so perfect, especially for today when I'm banging my head against a wall! Thank you for linking it up!

goldmoon said...

I wish I took more risks. I know when I'm old and think back on my life, the things I'll regret are the things I never had the courage to try. Yet, even knowing this, I'm often too scared to take a chance.

You, however, have moved to a new place by yourself! That is the boldest move of all!

Anonymous said...

I can't wait to see you!! Mikey

Neil said...

I don't know if you can always go around with a happy-happy persona. That doesn't seem like who you are inside. I think it might be better to remind yourself that everyone is afraid of the same things, just some people are better at handling it and moving forward. That could be you, too.