Oh the Humanity!

I've been thinking a lot about my attributes- having to write cover letters will do that to a person. I know better than anyone that I can be stubborn, opinionated, brutally honest and a hot head. I also know that even in the midst of being the most stubborn and indignant version of myself, I always lead with my heart and think of the other person's feelings. I think that is why I make a good leader- because I try to identify with people and believe the best in them. When we start to think the worst of people before they have even shown it, that's our problem, not theirs. And that kind of thinking just exacerbates situations in the most negative way.

I haven't worked for a corporation. I did my time in retail and scooped a few cones but the bulk of my work experience is in social service at non-profits. If you haven't worked at one, let me tell you, they are a very different animal. And sometimes when models of leadership and "business" are adopted in the not for profit sector. . . it's like wearing a suit on casual Friday. It just doesn't fit. Something. . . is. . . not. . . quite. . . right. When you are working for the betterment of your community or striving to help others and you adopt cold business-like practices you fundamentally take the heart of the agency's mission right out of the equation. Or at least, that is what I have seen happen. I truly believe you can be professional and fair and ethical AND have a sense of humanity. I just don't see many agencies succeeding at this.

I don't care much for the way "everyone does it" because I have my own ideas and because, frankly, how successful is "everyone" at the way they do it? I hate that excuse for people remaining stuck in old patterns or being too lazy or scared to think outside the box. I look around and all I can think is that we've lost our heart. People are operating out of their fear. They are too in their heads and too out of touch with their humanity. Maybe if we all started treating people with dignity and respect and love we'd be breeding a whole new animal other than the angry, paranoid one that seems to be slumbering in us now.

I'm very frustrated and I wish I could be more frank. A situation has presented itself to me that needs to be dealt with - immediately. But I am being instructed otherwise. And I am making it known I will not go along with "everyone"- because when you know what the right thing to do is in your gut, you can't betray it. All this situation does for me (besides making me anxious and irritated) is drive home the point: I have outgrown this place.