Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Mishaps & Glitches

My internet soul sister recommended this book to me. I ordered it from half.com and was about halfway into it when I discovered a serious problem. Around page 147, deep into character development and in the midst of a sexual tension moment between characters, I flip the page to find that after page 147 came page 215.

Wha?!

Upon further inspection it became very clear that I wouldn't be finishing my book anytime soon. There were forty pages in total missing. Well, forty pages from the end of the book were inserted where forty pages of the middle of the book should have been. Great! I get to read the ending twice but only surmise how the characters got there. Now that's some good reading.

After dealing with some low brow bookseller on half.com (they wouldn't return my email but instead made me call one of 5 numbers to speak to a slow-witted woman who lied through her teeth), I went to our local used bookstore and bought the damn thing for $7.80 plus tax. In an effort to get the book cheap, I ended up purchasing two copies totaling what I would have paid had I purchased it at full price. That'll learn me.

Fucking IRS. (Am I going to now be targeted for some sort of conspiracy by writing that on my blog?) I hate doing my taxes. Does anyone like doing their taxes? Ok, maybe some taxmen/women enjoy it as it is the line of work they have picked but I hate money and numbers so it follows that I would hate doing my taxes. A few weeks ago I received a notice in the mail from the IRS saying I owed $451 from 2004. I earned $1500 from a side gig and was paid a one time stipend. Apparently how I filed this income along with my regular income was incorrect. So, in their estimation, I owe the $451 in back taxes and interest. If their refiguring is right, being self-employed sucks ass.

But then(!) I received a check for $508 from the IRS just last week. Apparently I miscalculated on this year's taxes and am owed this amount. I have never earned this much back in all my years as an employed adult. How can this be? And then, doesn't the $508 basically cancel out the $451 I owe? That leaves me with a whopping $57. It could be worse. I shouldn't complain. But when it comes to money and numbers, my mind goes numb. I have a strange form of narcolepsy when it comes to math. Don't even try to make me do a word problem. If Sammy buys five apples for 10 cents each but receives a 12% discount for being under 12 and a 50% discount on one because it has a dent in it, how much will Sammy spend? Zzzzzz....Wha?! Sorry, the narcolepsy kicked in. Math = comatose. Give me a crossword puzzle though and I am alert and chipper.

18 comments:

alissa said...

I should have just sent you my copy! Darn it all. Trust me, you don't want to miss one page of it!

JustRun said...

I'm SO with you on the math thing. Every time I read a problem like: Train A is headed South at 70 mph and Train B is headed East at 80 mph. Assuming these trains left at the same time, what time will they arrive at their destinations assuming they're both 100 miles away and don't crash into one another. All I can think is where are the trains going and if I leave now, can I catch it?

Bill said...

Don't get me started on taxes ... (But since I'm there - could they make it more complicated? I don't think the migraines I get trying to figure out the convoluted horseshit are sufficient.) (Why don't they just have a line in there that reads, "Add 25% to offset what wealthy bastards will never pay.")

My own grief these days is time zones. Try figuring out when meetings are when the people you're meeting with are in eastern and pacific zones and you're mountain. Ahhh!

Jenny said...

i missed your funnies this weekend... thanx for laugh today :)

sandra said...

I'm so excited that you're reading The Cigarette Girl! You must tell me what you think when you're done.

Mrs. Ca said...

Taxes do suck - especially since I've now had to pay them instead of getting a refund for two years now. Grrr...

Also? That book thing sucks. Thanks for the heads up - I'll probably avoid half.com for books so I don't run into any similar mishaps. Is what you've read of the book so far good? Because I'm always looking for titles to add to my "To Read" list.

maseume said...

my return was denied by the irs and am 9 days late in deciding what to do about it. hmmm, it's not like I can go to jail or anything....no, no...I'm making the right choice by being a slacker about it all.

sue said...

Oh, dear.. you've hit a nerve here. We are farmers... hence, self-employed. Yes, it sucks. Thankfully, we have a very good (and patient) accountant who works my hate of all things math. (My father was an accountant - go figure). I can soooo sympathize.

Rabbit said...

I started reading a book awhile ago and the same thing happened halfway through. Since I bought it for something like $2, I put it away and forgot about it.

Claire said...

Turbotax makes it pretty painless. You fill in boxes, it does the math. For now, if your adjusted gross income is under 50 or 60 grand, you can file online for free if you go to the irs site and then click through to taxcut, turbotax, or one of several other options. Something to keep in mind for next year...

Melissa said...

Pfff, my accountant called on the 15th, he forgot about me and had to file an extention...

Nihilistic said...

I have never had to pay! I would cry if I did! CRY!!

GirlGoyle said...

Why would anyone remove pages from a book? It's just cruel! Like pulling out in the middle of an orgasm. Geez. Then again...I guess you get what you pay for when buying at half.com - you get exactly that...half!

Bre said...

(very)luckily for me, my pop-pop is an accountant and does... all of that... for me. Honestly, I have never filled out a tax form in my life and you impress me SO much by having done it at all! LOL And hey - that's 57 bucks worth of funny money - sounds like some new books and a pair of new flip-flops to me!

Mari said...

I had to take several prepatory math courses at my local community college before I was deemed legally sane to mix with the general population. I can relate with the feeling of being cast out from society simply because of my inability to calculate a tip.

Oh gosh and you mentioned Billy Ocean in the prvious post and all I can think of is being your Loverboy.

Anthony S. said...

I work at a Learning Center, and assist with two independent study courses, ONE of which deals with math word problems...I hold an English degree, yet can't figure out how Tom can cut a plank of wood into 3 separate shelves that is 3 feet long...I would call Home Depot, they get paid for that sort of thing.

I sometimes wish my life would jump from page 147 to page 215.

kilax said...

WTF?! Half.com sounds like it sucks. Sorry that happened to you! :-(

kapgar.com said...

You got so damned lucky on that tax thing. I am incredibly jealous.