Saturday, May 13, 2006

That Joke Isn't Funny Anymore

So I got to the bottom of the whole email thing yesterday. My friend, MJ (not Michael Jackson sillyheads), cleared things up:


I have never heard of this person ever in my life. Ever. Not even in college. But clearly Seattle doesn't want you, if random residents are sending you "stay the hell away" emails. Apparently you must stay in the Bay Area after all.

I can't believe he caved immediately and fingered me. Then again, the email would have been funnier and perhaps made more sense if he'd cc'd me (not to mention another friend of yours who so far shall remain nameless), so that it correctly appeared to be staged to prevent you from leaving and not just as some random abuse. Ah well, good execution's always the key.

Then I got more info from him:

I was on the phone yesterday with an anonymous friend who I'll call "Shmegan", and we were talking about how Sizzle's moving to Seattle and isn't that cool for you but totally sucks for us. Don't go! But of course you're going. Nonetheless I said "Hey, what if Seattle started sending her hate mail telling her to stay here in the bay area?" Shmegan agreed it'd be hilarious.

Too bad we were wrong. And poor K bore the brunt of it as the Seattle resident tapped to be the heavy. Now he fears you're going to come kick his ass or burn down his house or something. I have to assure him that you're a fabulous person, a great sport and the pure essence of fun, just bewildered by our sloppy execution. (Sorry again K!) Incidentally K's pretty damn awesome too, even if your only evidence to that is his utter willingness to go along with an ill-conceived joke. Don't kick his ass.

*************
Upon sharing this story with my friend Jazz, she promptly responded with: "Now THAT is a story you tell at your wedding reception. 'When we first met, he was the heavy and I was the victim in a cruel practical joke played by our mutual friends MJ and Shmegan. . .'"

There is a lesson in this somewhere, right? I kind of feel like a humorless bitch. And MJ and Shmegan (aka Bird!) are so getting their asses kicked.

11 comments:

Melissa said...

I'll say a prayer to the gods, let's hope he's hot, smart, well employed and has a much better sense of humor than this.

Bre said...

He left out the important information! Is K hot?! single? details... details...

;)

Brookelina said...

Take picturs of the ass kicking!

jeopardygirl said...

Aw, your friends are just going to miss you so much! Take it as a compliment... :)

Nihilistic said...

You know the whole things sounds like something I would do so I vote No ass kicking!

Claire said...

I'm glad it was just a joke. I kind of thought it might be yesterday, but since you were upset I didn't want to say anything to blow off your reaction.

goldmoon said...

Definitely kick their asses! And tell us about it!

Alison said...

Am I jetlagged, or did you quote a Smiths song in your title?

kapgar said...

Self portraits of you kicking their asses?

alissa said...

I feel like a humorless ass for ripping them a new one on your blog. I can't come visit you in Seattle now can I?

Will said...

So I shouldnt start an email campaign forcing you to move to Virginia?