Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Rescue Me!

So it is pouring down rain and I am already 10 minutes late for work. I jump a puddle and get in my car with lightning speed. I put the key in the ignition and . . .nothing happens. There is no juice. No power. No nothing. Crap!

I call work and tell them I am stranded and will be late. I try the ignition again. Still, nothing. No miracle has occurred in the last 10 seconds. I grab the handle to open the door. It is locked. I hit the automatic button for the door locks. It won't work. I hit it again and again and again. Still, nothing. I try the keychain button to unlock the doors. Nothing. Oh. My. God. I. Am. Trapped.

And I am freezing.

I call AAA. I am laughing. How ridiculous is this situation? Very. I talk to a very slow-witted fella at AAA. He doesn't get my jokes. Don't you get it fella? I am trapped in my car and I can't get out and it is freezing. This is hilarious. It's ok. You can laugh. He says it will be under 30 minutes. I quip, "Good thing I don't have to pee!"

I sit there for a second chuckling. I try the ignition again. What IS it about not believing your car is dead? I always try multiple times like somehow I had forgotten a magic step in turning my car on. I call my best friend because she'd get a kick out of this situation. Hell, who wouldn't? She doesn't answer. Bummer. I call Tomato. He doesn't answer. Double bummer. Where is everyone when I have such a funny story to tell them!?

Then it hits me: I can manually unlock my door. I reach over and pull up the lock. I am free!

Good God. I am brilliant. (Not.) Talk about looking like an idiot. Stupid. Stupid. I am just glad I didn't sit in that car like an a-hole thinking I was trapped. The roadside assistance guy arrives. We try to jump it. No go. He bangs on the starter. Still, nothing. He calls in a tow truck and I wait again. Tow truck driver arrives and takes the car a block away. Ah, irony. I give the mechanic my information and decide I can walk to work since it isn't raining.

So, of course, it starts to downpour. And, of course, I am not properly attired - wool coat and cap? Chuck Taylors? Check. Check. Soaking wet when I arrive to work? Check.

So much for riding that wave of positive feedback. Damn you Universe! But seriously? I cannot stop laughing.

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

We all have those blonde moments ;) I've watched a person try to get in her car because she locked the keys in it... and the window was down the whole time. LMAO

Anthony S. said...

I once locked my keys in my car at a gas station..with the keys still in the ignition, and the car running.

I felt like an idiot. On the plus side, the gas station attendant said he would tow me if I didn't move. Sweet guy.

B Merrick said...

I had to search for this one, but I finally found it... and so glad too!!!

http://www.purple-twinkie.com/video/audio/blondestar.mp3

JustRun said...

I can identify. No matter how long the blonde highlights have been gone, the damage can never be undone. :-)

Anonymous said...

I was willing to afford you the benefit of the doubt that you had a car with locks that recessed all the way down in the door. But, no, you blew that one. C'mon! You're not even a blonde!

Sizzle said...

i am so glad that most of you have already logged your votes on my johari window or else, my votes for "intelligent" would have gone WAY down after this post.

i was blonde once. maybe it stuck? ;)

SAJ said...

hil-larious!

Anonymous said...

But you're still smarter than me, because I probably would have busted the window out or something.

Anonymous said...

I got in a car accident a couple summers ago, minor damage but when I went to get in the car the next morning it wouldn't start. I called a tow truck and when he got there, he sat down in my car, tried to start it, then noticed I didn't have the car all the way in park. He moved it completely into park and voila, it started. I can totally relate to your moment of dimness!

Sorry about the cold and rain!

Mrs. Ca said...

I'd probably laugh too. I've done things like that (the stuck in the car thing) before and I always laugh at myself. A lot. Hope the rest of your day is going better!

Nihilistic said...

Too funny about being trapped in the car! I still think it would have been funny for the AAA guy to come up and find you sitting in your car with that trapped animal look in your eyes! HAHA

Bre said...

your sense of responsibility is amazing, seeing as I would have called work and said "screw it"

:)

How is your car doing now?

Gary said...

If you had known this was going to happen, you could have skipped your morning shower.

Anonymous said...

I think I need to blog about AAA thinking I was pranking them when I called for help once...

Poz Mikey said...

So I got trapped in a garage and you in a car two days later this week. Think you and I should hook up?

Anonymous said...

How about freaking out that the lock in the ladies' bathroom stall was stuck. yes, i never thought about crawling under the door to get out.

Bill said...

One more reason not to drive! Less embarrassing. Hee hee!

Dan said...

well, that's good that you can laugh. I can't

Jay said...

I am SO glad you can laugh about it. Our car went dead last weekend, and sadly, had the same reaction as you did. As if it's going to get better the more times you try. Hah!

Party Girl said...

I then realized I could manually unlock the door....
oh, classic! This is so something I would do. ...and probably have. I blame alcohol, even though none was probably present.

sue said...

HA!...em...er...sorry... HA!