Friday, March 31, 2006

867-5309

In the past week, two guys have either given me their number or asked for mine.

Hold up! Don't go getting too excited just yet.

It isn't that these fellas aren't nice. They seem to be. Or unattractive. They are cute. But what's the rush?

I used to say, in the world of dating, there are waders and there are divers. Some like to test the water temperature, easing a toe in and then maybe, a little bit later once they have adjusted, submerging up to the knees. Divers, on the other hand, they just walk right up to the water, take a deep breath and jump.

I used to be a diver.

My resistance to giving out my digits isn't based on disinterest in these particular fellas. It's that talking on the phone takes such effort when it is someone you don't know. And then, they have your number and can call you again. Even if you don't want them to. Or, worse, they can text you four months later saying something naughty about wanting you in their bed (see: Irishman). It's not like email where you can put a block. You might, if you get a crazy, have to change your number. No thanks. I don't want to risk it.

Now don't get me wrong. I do talk on the phone. Sometimes for over an hour at a time. Especially if I am talking to Hillz or Tomato or Dokey because we tend to mix current affairs with memories of the past and generally, we are working out some emotional situation. Because that is what we do. And these things take time. I can be talking to Hillz for over 2 hours and have no idea that much time has passed except for the fact that my ear hurts and my phone is about to die.

When it is someone new there is that pressure to entertain, to be on, to impress. I don't have the energy for that right now. I don't want to date. I am busy. I have things to do. I have big plans to implement. I have weight to lose. I have to wash my hair. I have to clean my andirons.

You understand?

So while I am flattered, I am not enthused. And I have to pay attention to that or else I will force myself to go along for sake of going along, for the sake of being "nice" (blech!) and end up in something I am not up for. Because let's face it, I am very charming. They will probably fall in love with me. (Ha! Ha! Ha!)

22 comments:

Lushy said...

You silly goose. There's no probably in that statement. Of course they will fall in love with you.

alissa said...

I can totally relate - dating can be exasperating sometimes (I remember!). Take care of you, first and foremost, when it's right, you won't feel like you have to be "on" all the time, things will just fall into place.

Nice to know you're H-O-T-T though right? You still got it baby!

Kevin said...

Well, you must also take into account some people's complete disinterest and hatred of phones (mine). I hate phones. Always have. Hate using them and hate having to carry around my cell.

Mrs. Ca said...

Come on. No "Ha! Ha! Ha!" about it. Why shouldn't they fall in love with you?

I used to be a diver too and I definitely fall fast. Good luck to you!

gronce said...

You are so, SO Smart! Glad you are realizing that you deserve more than a relationship with someone that you are only lukewarm about - now, at least.

P.S. You are looking very diva in your pics! Love the sassy do!

Bob Merrick said...

What's an andiron?

ocg said...

I am with Mrs. CA- no "ha ha ha"ing yourself. Unacceptable, regardless if it's your blog or not.

That being said... up to two hours on the phone? Amateur... for real, yo.
;-)

Claire said...

Good for you. Paying attention is important. I've been down that road before, a few times.

and Bob: Andirons hold up wood in a fireplace, they come in pairs.

JustRun said...

Former diver here, as well. Now I'm not so much a wader as I am a wait-for-something-to-jump-out-of-the-water-at-me type. If ya a'int feeling it, ya a'int feeling it. I say good for you!

Bre said...

My philosophy is this - you can have my number, and in the morning if you're still interested we can discuss it from there. Because I'm not a first move kind of girl, I've never been one and I can't imagine becoming one.

Kilt Trip said...

Congrats on not diving Sizz..My style has usually been walking by the pool, tripping, and falling face first into the dating pool. But I've been taking your approach lately. Isn't it fun taking a bit more control of the situation?

jenny said...

I didn't clean my andirons for like, two and a half years, and my dentist told me he was going to drop me as a patient.

Amanda said...

Good for you Sizz!

ps. Give yourself some credit! :P
no ha ha ha about it.

goldmoon said...

Of COURSE they'll fall in love with you! And that's the fun part!

Bex said...

i loathe the phone. especially talking to someone new. i'm terrible at it. hell, im still terrible at talking to people i know well on the phone! just not a person. great in person, not on the phone.
and good for you for going with your gut and not just for the sake of being nice. been there too, it's bad news! because they will fall in love with you, and then you have to let them down, and that just sucks.

Mikey said...

I'm a wader right now.

Nihilistic said...

You are very charming!

Gary said...

This could be great. They will probably think you are playing hard to get and it will spur them on. :)

BTW,there needs to be a telephone service where someone can give out a number that isn't their real number, but instead is a password that dials the real number. In other words, you could be reached without someone knowing your real number. The password would just be temporary. I'll bet a lot of people would pay a few bucks a month for something like that. I'll bet I would.

Neil said...

Can I disagree with everyone and tell Ms. Sizzle her post was nonsense?! Two guys want your number and this is your response? Why must it be an either/or situation? If these guys are interested, and you're interested, surely you can find twenty minutes to talk to them on the phone and arrange a date. Then, after a date, you can decide whether or not you want to continue. The ball is always in your court. If you're really not interested, that's one thing. But if you're too worried about having to entertain him, stop worrying -- and let him entertain you! You can still be a diver. Just keep your foot tied to the anchor on the pier.

Bill said...

I think I'm the poster child for waders. In fact, I think I make waders seem like divers. I think if someone asked for my phone number I would probably look at them suspiciously and ask, "Why?"

As for asking them, I'm geeky enough to ask, "What's your e-mail?" Because I probably don't want to talk to them. I'd rather write. I'm can finesse my image that way. :-)

Perhaps that's why I only ever seem to talk to the cat?

Will said...

So I should stop with the naughty text messages?

GirlGoyle said...

I'm more of the swamp thing comes jumping out of the water and sucks me in. Usually I have no idea what hit me until it is too late. Imagine that!

As for you Ms. Sizz...my take is that if you were interested in any of these two guys you wouldn't have had qualms about passing up the opportunity to have them call you. So...good riddance. The right one will eventually show up and you'll find yourself sitting by the phone willing it to ring.