Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Mischievous, Who Me?

Yesterday, I was a naughty girl. (Not like that, you pervs.) All that posting about a man not worth my energy or time. That is SO yesterday. I am totally over it.

Clearing the air is good for the soul though. I bet you already knew that. In the last few weeks, I've had a few of those "air clearing" talks. I was feeling very closed off and resentful. Holding all those messy, dark feelings inside was turning me into an embittered woman and frankly, being embittered is really bad for your skin. It ages you. And nobody wants to hang out with you or if they do, they wish they hadn't. It is a lose/lose situation.

It makes me sad and frustrated to see people stuck in their fear, myself included. We trap ourselves into believing the worst and somehow convince ourselves that this is what we deserve. It's not! When you focus on the negative, all you see is the negative. I think of it sort of like my dad's blindness. He had retinitis pigmintosa which, over time, diminished his peripheral vision to the point at which he was blind when he passed away. When we choke our spirits with all the negative crap of life, our vision becomes more and more tunneled until we can't see the light at all. Only darkness.

Each day I embrace tighter the me I choose to be in the world and know, deeper and deeper, that I always have a choice in how I see the world.

2 comments:

B Merrick said...

Very well spoken... and I love the new layout... so clean and tight! Just how I like...

Anonymous said...

"embittered is really bad for your skin" is one of those lines i'm going to have to borrow...along with the sentiment of air-clearing.

- jules